A Sunday kind of post
I am a firm believe in “better late than never.” Besides the fact that my Cuban genetics would not have survived otherwise, I also just feel that ‘never’ is so permanent and ‘late’ is more, “Sorry! I was walking out the door and then I realized I didn’t have my keys and then 10 minutes later I finally found them under the couch.” I realize that lateness can come across as a level of disrespect but never feels like it’s at the same level with apathy, unless you have a written excuse from your doctor or therapist saying: “Sorry Irene can’t make it out today, she’s been overstimulated all week and needs a day to stare at the wall.”
I think “stare at the wall days” aren't talked about enough. I want to admit something before I open this can of worms: I sat down to write, put on my blue blocker glasses, then I realized my blue blockers were smudged, I went to clean them, then had a bit of solution still left on the wipe so I cleaned another two pairs of glasses and then seven minutes later is when I finally sat down to write. I also just daydreamed for two minutes about reorganizing my house in between that last sentence and this one. And this is me on my Adderall. I like being honest because sometimes this stream of consciousness feel that comes across in writing can lead the reader to believe that it just flowed out when it’s quiet the opposite and I even have my little time cube ticking to keep me somewhat in line.
Getting back to “stare at the wall day(s).” It’s another firm belief of mine (lots of firm beliefs today) that everyone needs at least one, maybe two a week, depending on how hectic your life is. Usually that’s what the weekends are for, but I think we’ve all busied ourselves with hangouts, which can be fun, or catching up on chores or running errands, less fun, unless you run errands with a friend - fun again. A “stare at the wall day” really just means a day free from responsibilities/errands/work/social obligations where you can just literally stare at the wall and let your mind rest, or read or nap, or watch all of Beef in one sitting, etc. I really don’t know how parents do it but that’s a post for another day. We get ‘personal’ days at work but I can’t wait till we can actually tell our employers that we need a mental health day just because we’re *cough* burnt out. Imagine if/when "‘wall days” becomes it’s own thing! Oh the staring we will do! I gather that’s why meditating is so important, it’s a five/ten/20 minute “stare at the wall” for you mind, but then you come out of it, and you have to text your mom back, pay ConEd, feed your pup - minutes for the mind are not enough! We need hours of nothing and we need it whenever we can fit because we’re all too busy, an inappropriate amount of busy. It’s no wonder any New Yorker who can, buys a cabin upstate as soon as they’re able to because they’re tired of being pushed and overstimulated for however many years. They need a whole “stare at the wall” property with acres nature being the ultimate, living wall.
I hope you’re able to have a stare at the wall day this week, next week, and every week, forever. I’m writing this post on a Sunday because today is this closest thing I’ve had to a “stare at the wall” day all week. Woof. A whole post to explain why this came out on a Sunday instead of a Friday? Better late than never.